Intro

I hurt a friend. A person I would do anything to protect was ripped apart by my vicious words.

What I said was awful and they may never forgive me. I know I’ll never forgive myself.  I lost my temper over something stupid and I have the tendency to go right for the jugular when I’m really upset. Why do I do that? No idea. I have this mean streak that will completely take over sometimes. I’ve ruined relationships and have gotten myself into trouble more times than I care to reflect on because I don’t take two minutes to think about the impact of my words.

Most people would tell you that I’m not an everyday asshole. On one end they’ll tell you I’m polite and generous, and on the other end they’ll tell you I’m “spirited” or “sassy.” A typical Aries, if you believe that sort of thing. The problem is that my instinct is to rip someone apart the second they threaten or offend me. I’m like a grown-up Regina George the second conflict arises.

This needs to change. Not just because I hurt someone I love, but because one little action can make or break a person.  

I hate to drop anything that would be used on an e-card, but the quote “be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle,” really hits me. I want kindness and compassion to be my default rather than snideness. I want to understand a person's battle rather than attacking them. I want to love openly and not hide behind a mask of nasty humor. 

This is why I’m starting The Kind Instinct.

Each day I'm going to seek out opportunities for kindness. It's pathetic, but this is something that I need to learn. It's not that I don't genuinely care about people, but my instinct should not be to belittle someone when I'm angry. The little sarcastic comments and the judgmental glares all add up. I need to surround myself with so much love and compassion that kindness becomes my instinct.